The internet has been abuzz recently with the story of the USC frat boy who sent an email to his frat brothers, describing how to be an effective ‘cocksman’ (read: frat boy language for ladies man). Both in college and even now, I have listened to my male friends describe the best way to seduce women and I have also listened to them talking up their sexual exploits. Usually, their conversation has been harmless and hasn’t offended me or made me think that they see women just as vehicles for sex. However, this particular email is different. This email is extremely derogatory and racist toward women, even saying that women ‘aren’t actual people like us men. Consequently, giving them a certain name or distinction is pointless.’ Instead, he refers to women merely as ‘targets’. Classy.
But that’s not all, the writer goes on to note that wearing a condom when having sex is unacceptable, and the only drawback is that you ‘may need to visit the clinic more often’. He doesn’t even mention the fact that unprotected sex could equal a baby or express any concern for the girl contracting a STD. I guess because he can’t get pregnant, and we already know that he doesn’t have any concern for the female, so he probably doesn’t care.
He also mandates that his frat brothers should, ‘be careful when you cheat, but still cheat’ and that some women may need a lot of alcohol to let them have sex with them, so you should be prepared to buy a lot of alcohol to get them. Yeah, because seeings as women are not people, they don’t have feelings, and won’t mind being played. Oh, and the frat brothers should also remember not to ‘f*** middle-eastern targets. Exhibit some patriotism and have some pride. You want your c*** smelling like falafel? Filth.’ SMH
But wait, there’s more.
He says that ‘non-consent and rape are two different things. There is a fine line, so make sure not to cross it.’. WTF? Isn’t the exact definition of rape, non-consensual sex? There is no difference between the two. But as we have already established his feelings toward women, I suppose it should come as no surprise that he promotes rape.
I read the whole email (click here to read), thinking that it was surely ironic or a poorly executed joke, but sadly, it seems that the whole thing was in fact, designed as a ‘hook-up manual’ for the USC Kappa Sigma brothers, and the writer is deadly serious about his opinions of women and (for want of a better word) dating. This is what is shocking.
People I read this with argued that it is just stupid college boy humor, and no one can really think like that, but I have to disagree. College boys are grown men, and while they are still young and may be out to sleep around, not enter into relationships, they should still know the difference between consensual sex and rape, or for the very very least, understand that women are in fact, human. Being in college is no excuse for the objectification of women (and I know women have done it against men as well, with the girl from Duke, and I am not condoning her either). Assuming this guy is halfway done with his course, (which I am guessing he is at least, as he claims to have slept with over 50 ‘targets’), he will be entering the work force full time in less than two years, and then, no one will make excuses for his behavior and claim he is too young to know what he is doing. So if, in two years or less he will be considered mature and adult enough to work full time, then we must assume that this is actually the way he thinks.
And that is where I think the problem lies. It seems that there are always new stories about a college hot list, rating girls on their attractiveness, and if that is not just ‘silly college stuff’, then how can we assume that the boys making these lists will not still have these opinions when they supposedly ‘grow up?’
In a week when a 10 year old call has called out Lil Wayne for objectifying women in his lyrics and the state of Georgia are contemplating a law against women, making miscarrying illegal, this is just one more example of the degrading, demeaning way in which women are still seen in our society.